Time to sit down after a meeting of seemingly infinite langth and collect me thoughts. Recovering from a broadside from Mrs Jackanapes which was far too close to the bone!! Bighead indeed! and she dished my harmonica and my reading matter. Can't even sue her for this one, cos it was true.
Well I suppose retaliation might be second best, but it is oh so much sweeter!
You might have been aware on this mornings news that a certain Mr Brown had rung up a certain Mr Ashdown and asked him whether he would be in the cabinet. That much is common knowledge. What was missed by the tabloids, (but not by me cos I've got a big head) is that he actually rang up Mrs Jackanapes straight afterwards and offered her the post...can you believe it??? (no I thought not...would I lie to you). No one is quite sure which post he was offering, but, I have had it on good authority, that she will be heading up a new Ministry of Information, owing to her ability to write facts honestly and impartially and her ability to pass compliments at the drop of a hat.
Certain lower class tabloids have hinted darkly that she obtained the post following an altercation in a second class railway carriage a couple of days ago, between the aforementioned gentleman and two English ladies impersonating ticket inspectors, placing Mr Brown in an impossible position from which he couldnt possibly escape from; but I dont read common tosh like that and have no reason to believe it. Mrs Jackanapes never travels first class-not in a uniform anyway.
So it looks like her political career has really taken off. She'll be having John Humphreys in an armlock before you can say "crash the pips". Im just waiting for the time in the not too distant future where she signs herself off Lady Jackanapes of Billarichy. Then we will all be in trouble (and not just me!)......
Blue
The Ice Cream Girl
Every day is sundae...
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Recovered from your tribulations bighead?
Maybe a spoonful of tinned rice pudding would buck you up.
Or a dollop of custard slapped on top of your chocolate Hobnob.
But glurking culinary things to one side let's talk about my promotion to High Office, namely as Mr Brown's side kick and boss at the Ministry of Truth, this, my dear sparring partner, is an ideal position for me, cos I'll be able to use all me diplomatic and social skills at once. You know,at the same time.And if I please Mr Brown I'm sure I'll be holding a number of other positions in his well- stocked cabinet.
And another thing I must say though, immediately, and at once, is that I did not get this position by getting into other positions. After all I am an intelligent Lady who uses her grey stuff instead of her pink stuff.
In a nutshell my world is the world of hip flasks, itchy uniforms and high office.
I do not wish to give lip service to my positions no more. Thank You.
But I must just say, me old tongue is positively hanging limp at the prospect of having John Humphrey's 'ead in me armpit,while asking him, GENTLY MIND YOU! what he thinks of England's chances in Euro 2008.
I like him.
But not enough to crush his pips. For him.
Mrs Jackanapes of The 'Ouse with No Net
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